Some people literally don’t shut up. They talk incessantly. They aren’t incorporating any pregnant pauses or seconds for contemplation into the conversation. They fill most moment with words, whether they are meaningful or not. They have a story for everything. “You got a story? I’ve got 10 stories for your story”. These people are afflicted with what I call the Talking Disease.
Those afflicted with the Talking Disease often know they have it, and even state out loud “I know, I’m talking too much”; others are quite clueless that their one-sided party crashing conversation is creeping over the line of comfortable boundaries. They aren’t intentionally trying to be rude. It’s a compulsion of unawareness.
Talkacoholics are uncomfortable with themselves. They are insecure or nervous. They might have a degree of brain trauma from recreational or pharmaceutical drug use, alcohol use and/or minor or major head injuries from sports, motor accidents, birth, etc.
When reviewing all this information is does make it easier to have compassion for someone who can’t shut up. The compassion card is handy when making space for my own personal responsibility. I can recognize when someone is a hardcore talkster and direct my energy accordingly.
This might include leaving the room, using a “talking stick” during meetings (which is highly effective, by the way), or redirecting the conversation away from current monologue. These are the best solutions I’ve come up with at this time. I’ve been contemplating for a while on the best way to deal with people who have the Talking Disease. It probably as simple as me saying something like “Yo. You’re talking way too much, bro. It’s overwhelming. Stop it.”
Personally, I enjoy quietude & harmonious conversational exchanges so unwelcome noise or oral drivel literally feels intrusive to me. Thus, I do have a natural aversion to Talky McTalkersons.
In my opinion, the talking disease is a genuine affliction. A person who talks incessantly is likely not being present in the moment or paying attention to their surroundings or the people in them.
There is a certain magic that happens when we tune in to simply being rather than filling the void with sound.
It’s a good idea to Shut up and Listen.